The clouds are long past me
But their shadows remain
The sense of dark is enveloping
Seeming inhumane.

What is immortallity?
I say it's just a word
I lost my faith it's killing me
But it is so absurd.

That I am slowly losing
A battle I've already fought
That I am slowly losing
Everything that I've got.

The only thing that I have left
Seems to be my skin
And the thing I can't escape from
Is the position that I'm in.

I've managed to escape my family
I've managed to escape my very best friend
I've ran away from everything
But it is not yet to end.

I know that I will not kill myself
But I am still afraid
of my insecurites in life
of the decisions I have made.

I just want this to be done
I want this to be gone
I want the suffering to stop
I just want to go on.

The truth is I've been lying
To you and even me
I show you an innocent girl
A girl who is happy.

But the truth is that I hate myself
And everything around
I don't think my pain will stop
Till I'm six feet underground.

I think that I am used to
the daggers in my heart
The happiness will never flow
The love will never start.

I won't accept your help
I will adapt to the pain.

The clouds are coming back now
And it's begun to rain.